Let’s pause for a moment and simply try to identify this voice we all have in our heads. That voice that is always there, telling us stories, explaining to us why things happened, judging what we see, and analyzing every situation.
When we stop and listen to it, a fascinating question arises: if we are the ones identifying this voice, hearing it, and seeing the stories it tells – doesn’t that mean we are not actually the voice, but the ones observing it?
This realization is the turning point. One of our most common misconceptions when we start practicing mindfulness is the thought that the goal is to “empty the mind of thoughts” or reach absolute silence. We sit on the cushion, close our eyes, and immediately discover that the voice is right there. This voice is the filter through which we experience our entire reality. It judges, explains, interprets, and primarily directs us to react based on all of these.
For instance, to take a very trivial example: if someone looks at us on the street, the voice will immediately tell us a story about why it happened – and this story is what will determine whether we feel joy, insult, or anxiety. We might even decide on a reaction based on the story and the emotion it evoked. And it’s all just the voice in our head.
The Source of Suffering is Not the Voice Itself
Through observation, a deep and liberating insight emerges: our suffering and distress do not stem from the mere existence of this voice. There will always be a voice speaking in the background; this is the nature of our human consciousness. This voice is a result of causes, and it itself generates causes for its continuation, but that’s not the topic of this article.
Suffering is born the moment we blindly believe this voice. It is created when we give absolute validity and meaning to its interpretation, and worse, when we fall for the illusion and think: “This voice is me.”
Don’t Silence It – Soften It
Our work is not to wage a violent war against our consciousness in an attempt to silence the voice. The attempt to erase it only creates more struggle and tension within us. Our true practice is to change our relationship with it – to “extract” from it the harsh, rigid, and critical tone that usually accompanies it.
Instead of trying to turn off the inner narrator, we can start to notice its tone, and invite a benevolent and supportive presence inward. A presence that listens to the voice but is in no rush to believe it or identify with it. When we stop clinging to every word it says as if it were the absolute truth, something inside us begins to calm down. The harsh tone gives way, and the voice can become more pleasant, more supportive, and more constructive.
The Freedom to Choose Our Thoughts
The moment we understand that this voice has no absolute meaning or truth of its own – after all, we are the ones observing it – a tremendous freedom of action is revealed to us. If the stories it tells are not objective reality, we are no longer its victims.
We can consciously choose to do things, bring in inspiration, and cultivate habits that will cause this voice to tell us good things. We can feed our consciousness with content that will grow an inner voice that is beneficial to us and our surroundings.
Our Dance of Remembering
This path does not require perfection from us. Throughout the day, we will forget, get sucked back into the voice’s stories, and identify with it. This is completely natural. The magic happens in that split second when we realize: “There, I believed that story again.”
In that exact moment, we are no longer the voice. We have returned to being the observers. We have returned to the here and now. All that is left for us to do in that moment is to smile a small, forgiving smile at ourselves, release our grip, and rest once again in the open, quiet presence beyond words.
Mindful Education 